Ive finally been running regularly. Feels awesome, and I got some new gear today, but of course its raining, and it may rain most of the week. Blech! New running underpants, tank top, and a dress for this summer that is SUPER comfortable. The underpants and dress were on sale YAY!
However, I do NOT have the shoes. They are Newtons and are uber expensive. I really want to try them, but can’t spend the money. I would also like to try a pair of Vibrams. Keyword, try. I don’t think I would want to run in them all the time.
Why do I run?
Me: “Ma, I ran 6 and a half miles today.”
Mom: “Why?”
Me: “…”
Hmmm… whats the point of it all? I’ve been struggling with this lately. Sometimes I run to be alone, to be outside, to vent my frustrations, to cheer myself up, to physically feel as bad as I mentally do, because I think I have to, and/or to make myself look better. There are more reasons and each run is motivated by a mix of them. My problem is… should I be taking things further? I don’t do races, or search out running groups to be a part of. If I raced, would I feel more accomplished and more motivated? Feel like I am part of a team or community of people? I know one main reason why I don’t is because I have to much anxiety. For one, I am nervous around groups of people, and two, even more so having to participate in something organized. Maybe someday I will try a race. Someone will talk me into it. Maybe I could get some nifty t-shirts. 
But for now, I will concentrate on using it as a personal therapy.
Maybe someday you could do charity type runs like Race for the Cure or something?